It's been a few weeks after having experienced a week-long global conference with co-creatives from all around the world converging to discuss and conflux in co-creating REALITY. I'm trying to see what's left in me and how to synthesize everything that transpired during the event, my realizations, current aspirations and deal with my current reality. Somehow the conference venue's elevation gave a great source of spiritual energy from the earth to come into our senses of things that needed to be done and undone in our different lives. Just as I got back to Cebu, all of those grand ideas kept floating in my mind. And I must admit, am a bit uneasy of keeping my excitement from having not being able to start doing some ground work/foundations to stabilizing those great ideas (and soon to be a physical reality) worthy to remain up there highest in the sky. Having to wait for the rest of Pag-asa youth for our meeting, as well as feeling the distance-conquering energies of international delegates going back to their communities and doing their respective calling as being shared during the conference, drove me overwhelmingly crazy! Having the feeling of being "stuck" to my room by myself has become a great challenge coz I cannot stop my mind from thinking. I had to watch movies just to distract my mind a bit and before I realize it am back to thinking again and back to the feeling of being stuck!
I remembered what Orland Bishop said that in order to feel the flow, one must be near the element of water. And so I went to check the pool at Abellana Sports Complex. On one pool, I watched the kids enjoying the waters while learning how to swim. I also watched the athletes seriously training to achieve their goals on the other pool. And on the same bleachers I am sitting in, are their parents, guardians and friends doing their anti-idle activities while waiting for their respective swimmer to finish. I also watched myself watching everything around me hoping to take my mind off from my soon to be lifelong engagement with my new world. A new world of having to cross an abysmal space from the familiar grounds. A major pivot of my life which necessitates letting go of attachments, establishing new relationships, and to be doing a lot of tasks til death do me part!. And while sensing all these in me, I got amazed externally as to how the pools' waters became and is an instrument of achieving all people's intention of attention as why we were gathered at that exact same place with different realities joined into one. And while all of these are happening, I took two of my favourite pens and found myself sketching monster waves (though I wanted it to be monstrously, gracefully, zen-like-yet-to-no-avail-didn't-look-anything-close-to-waves) and finished the entire strong doodle with the realization that
Commitments can be drowning though we might simply have forgotten how to breathe. Sometimes we only need to be reminded of our childhood that we instinctively love to swim.
Taking that as a cue, I took a dip in the pool for 30 minutes. A decision came to heal all the fears I have with drowning by simply synchronizing myself in and out of the deep water. Managing my body weight down to the bottom and kicking from the bottom to go way back up. Knowing when to breathe and not to breathe. Feeling my heart pound faster as I paddle and calmer as I decelerate. Trusting that the law of buoyancy will keep me still on the surface. And as far from the speed of everyone else, I am content with having this kind of nonathletic dialogue with the water yet keeping in mind my sense of being with everyone else' inside the pool.
Significant moments of our lives, we could have experienced more than one big bad swim. But that doesn't mean we stop breathing and allow ourselves to get drowned. Sometimes all it takes is to commit to the child in us not to forget how we loved experiencing the waters despite of how unclear and dynamic they flow to be. ---



Recent Comments